Why Velocity Channel WHY?

   So, I love the Velocity Channel but this weeks Wannabe Hotrodder installment is gonna have to rail against them. The Velocity Channel is a car guys cream dream but as of late I am a bit confused. See, there seems to be a very disturbing trend on the channel, they seem to relish in showing me glorious European roadsters from the 50s and 60s. Show after show dedicated to bringing me barn finds and auction house “deals” of multimillion dollar ferrari and lamborghini. Now, these truly are wonderful cars and have their place in auto history but, and this is a HUGE BUT, I don’t need every singe program to show me all these glorious million dollar cars that I could never own. More and more of the channels programming seems to be leaning toward this and I am not quite sure why? There are tons and TONS of awesome incredible custom cars and hotrods and all kinds of American automobiles that could be part of their programming.
    I don’t want this to be misconstrued as a knock against all those awesome technological marvels. They are freakin’ insanely awesome cars that most any car lover would be thrilled to own. The fact of the matter is I could take all the money that my entire family blood line has and will make for all time and that still wouldn’t be able to buy one, so why am I being shown these cars? I am this channels key demographic. Do they want me to like strive to be able to buy one? I can’t, and even if I did have the money I wouldn’t buy one because that kind of extravagant spending it ludicrous. So what is the end game of the programming? Do they set out to just make their viewers feel like crap? That doesn’t seem like sound programming.
   I guess in the end I just want the Velocity Channel to survive. I love it, and I hope it can stay relevant. Because I fear if it stays on its current trajectory it will fall the way of TechTV and the dodo bird. Just a distant memory of what could have been. Now show us some god damn muscle cars that the common man can relate to already!!!!

Auctions Continue To Create A World That Doesn't Exsist

So, in case you missed it cars that many of us grew up seeing every day are now made of pure gold. Either gold or unobtanium. Either way they are EXPENSIVE. Well, depending on where you look they are. See, there is a massive disconnect between reality and what television or "TV" might have us believe. Not sure what I am talking about, please let me expound.

When you think of the awesome Detroit steel of the 60s and 70s it raises the hair on the back of your neck. They are big and mean, fast and loud. They are in a word AWESOME. They had wicked names like firebird and mustang and cougar and chevelle... names that evoked passion and desire for bad mistakes and burning tires. Growing up with them they always hovered in the affordable range. I am pretty sure you got a 65 mustang free with a fill up and a large slirpee for a while in the mid-eighties. Detroit made about 78 billion of these bad ass cars so they were always plentiful. The ones that didn't wrap themselves around a telephone pole that is.

Fast forward to the twenty-teens, a time when the 1% walks with impunity and reality television shapes what we think is reality. Dark times man, dark dark times. Sure, it started simple enough. Watching dudes work on stuff and make cool restoration projects. Then we got introduced to "flippers" or low level scavengers that are buying junk and as the old saying goes... polishing a turd. Fair enough, that has been going on forever but what hasn't gone on forever is television creating unrealistic prices. I was watching a super hyped "superbowl of auto auctions" the other week where a richey rich who had been buying up all of hotrod history for a million years decided it was time to flaunt his status and sell everything so we could all bask in his "i am way better than you" cult status. SO, other richey rich types showed up in droves to prove THEY could be that cool and rich too. As a result us common jerks got to watch mustangs sell for hundreds of thousands.

By the time it was over said richey could actually build his own world and live in a different galaxy made entirely of gold. Now, I am not just writing to rail against rich folks... I mean I will but that is not why I am here TODAY. The effect of reality TV creating this superbowl of car pricing is the entire baseline for old muscle cars took a dramatic leap upward. Remember like 2 paragraphs ago when I talked of those "flippers"? Yeah, well now those polished turds cost 10 times more than they did a year ago because every slack jawed yokel watched those shows and were like "I got one of those... so it MUST be worth as much as barrett jackson got."

Bad news, it isn't worth that much. The ones that were sold on that sad day were the absolute top of the top cars created or restored by the best of the best and most were 1 off super rare touched by god editions. So for those of us out there looking, we now have a few years more to save our money. After the flippers lose their asses and get no actual bites on the cars they are trying to get gold for the market will re-adjust back to reality. So just like the housing bubble, the gold bubble and every other made up price increase the muscle car bubble will burst. And when it does I will be there to grab up the prize, until then I will watch and wait.

Swap Meets Ain't What They Used To Be!

 

Beach Boys - 409

So, went with a friend we shall call "Murder Stang" to a local auto swap meet. Both of us were filled with hopes and dreams of finding our every auto whim. Spoiler Alert... we both left disappointed. This was a very grand affair with an auto auction, a "car corral" in which you tried to buy cars directly from the owner and of course row upon row of swap meet goodies.

Here is where my head scratching came into play. It had the usual tables of tools bought from the local Harbor Freight then broken apart and sold per piece for profit. Eh, i gave up that level junk a while ago. Then it had table after table of various odds and ends parts, you know like an oil pan from a 73 pinto and a broken ford mustang emblem. And we all know no auto swap meet would be complete with row upon row of "automobilia." The crate upon crate of common license plates for sale for large sums of money. Gas pumps that cost 5 times as much now than then did back when they were actually selling gas from their nozzles. And various fake reproduction and authentic road signs (like a STOP sign... like from the end of my street and every street in America).

I get it, supply and demand. What i don't get is when did swap meets become like Ebay in that they are a "buy it now - at this set price" style commerce? Olden days of yor people haggled and traded or "SWAPPED" if you will for goods and services. Prices were merely suggestions as to where to start arguing over price. Good times man, those long gone days were good times indeed! Now it is a confusing world of $2k roadrunner gauge clusters and used AC Delco display boxes for $80 each. So much like my fading memories so are the hopes that any auto swap meet will give me my hotrod. Alas i am STILL a wannabe hotrodder, maybe the next swap meet will save me? Nah... but a man can dream.